San Francisco announces plan to release monkeys onto the streets to fling away all the poo

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — In an effort to finally clean up the streets, San Francisco announced they will release several packs of monkeys into the city to help fling away all the poo. “We all know monkeys like to throw poo,” said John Hawkins, Director for the Department of Sanitation. “We have lots of poo. It’s a match made in heaven.”